7 Items made better by Homer Simpson

The Simpsons — I could easily say that The Simpsons ARE pop culture. If satire was indeed an art form, then the hundreds(?) of awards and merit they have acquired since the beginning should be a fine measure for success. Along the way, of course, they’ve made a fortune from merchandising. I have a theory on it — add Homer to any product, and it will sell. (Probably)

Don’t believe me? Compare these products with their normal, run-of-the-mill equivalent, and see which one you prefer.

The Simpsons Talking Homer Operation – Take that, original Operation Game! Ailments include bowler’s thumb, rubber neck and trick knee. Pieces unique to the game are a donut, a pretzel and a bowling pin. Instead of the usual buzz sound when you make a mistake, Homer gives a funny one-liner criticizing your operating skills.

Duff beer and Flaming Moe’s Energy Drink – Red Bull? Bawls? Forget ‘em! Here’s the real energy drink you gotta have — both have a different packaging but are both energy drinks that contain ingredients of what constitutes an energy drink: Taurine, Inositol, Guarana, Ginseng, and, the stuff of legends, caffeine. The Duff can is especially interesting, since, save for the words “Energy Drink,” (it’s BEER in the cartoons) it looks exactly like the cans that Homer chugs on the show. (Did I mention they also have Buzz Cola?)

The Simpsons: Message Mate and Remote Control Holder – Okay, so you can’t get a TV station that has 24/7 Simpsons reruns, but at least you could keep your remote controls handy for when watching something else. The fun thing is, when you press your remote, the base gives out one-liner from the Simpsons, like, “TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me.” You could even record your own messages — not that I’d think anyone would want to — I could hear it now, spouting, “Booooring!”

The Simpsons: 3 Piece BBQ Utensils Set – Who says you can’t take the Simpsons out for BBQ? Now you could have a matching set of Homer “Kiss the Chef” Simpson and Ned “Bishop of BBQ” Flanders spicing up that little picnic, for when you’re fighting off your Simpsons withdrawal.

“Kiss the Chef” Homer Figure – Okay, so I can’t find any “Kiss the Chef” aprons for the last item’s barbeque, but I found the next best thing: a figurine of Homer, still wearing the “Kiss the Chef” apron, (continuity, yow) suddenly realizing exactly how much gas you should put on your grill.

Simpsons Boxer Shorts – I dunno about you, but I like funny underwear – it amuses me that while under a suit, the Simpsons family is protecting me from chafing.

Simpsons DVDs – Come on! Who wants to watch any other show? I grew up doing “the Bartman” — I love this on-screen family. And who knows for how long they’ll keep entertaining me? To me, these were the first true adult-themed cartoons, only because they were satirizing what was true and real in our world. Now that I’ve grown up, I also find that certain jokes only apply when you’re older, thus rewarding repeated viewings of the material.

~ by thebiglife on April 14, 2008.